Page 18 - Demo

18 | January 2024
Slippery Rock Gazette
The Stone Detective
The Case of the Sky is Falling
I thought I heard her wrong, but I just listened as she went on and on. Finally, she calmed down and told me that she was waiting for her car insurance company to come by and assess the accident. “What?” I said. “What does your auto insurance have to do with tiles falling?” She told me that I needed to be there when the insurance adjuster arrived so I could explain. I thought maybe she was a little confused, or she had been drinking or smoking something strong. I got the address and asked her when she needed me to be there. She said 1 pm. She was only an
hour away, so that was doable.
I arrived at her house and noticed sev-
eral people standing around a car parked with several vans nearby. One belonged to an auto glass repair person, and the other was a tow truck. I was really confused at this point, but as I said before, I thought I had seen it all.
Over the past 40 years, I thought I had seen everything. Today would prove me wrong.
I was sitting at my favorite greasy spoon, listening to the Admiral while reading the newspaper. Yes, folks, there is still a thing called a newspaper. There’s something about reading the news on paper rather than getting it on my smartphone that appeals to me. Maybe this is dating me as belonging to an older generation, but it was always a tra- dition growing up. I was reading the opin- ion page, and this person was talking about the fairy tale Chicken Little. You know, the one where he keeps yelling that the sky is falling. This guy was digging into the cur- rent social relevance of this fairy tale when my phone rang. The voice on the other end was a lady, and she was crying and mum- bling something like, “The tiles are falling!”
Dr. Frederick M. Hueston, PhD
I got out of the old Woody and walked over to see what all the fuss was about. The minute I walked over there, I couldn’t believe my eyes. There was a large stone panel sticking out of the windshield of the car, with broken pieces all over the ground.
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