Dr. Frederick M. Hueston, PhD

I was eating breakfast at my favorite greasy spoon and flirting with Flo when my phone rang. I answered it with a casual,  “Stone Detective, here.” The person calling said she had several red stains on her marble floor, and she needed help trying to find out what they are and how to remove them.

I put down my coffee cup and wiped my mouth with my napkin. A dame with a mystery on her hands – it sounded like just the kind of case that could put a little jingle in my pocket. I told the voice on the other end of the line to give me the address and I’d be there in a jiffy.

I hopped in my ole Woody and made my way across town to the swanky side of the city. Her mansion was impressive, but it was the red stains on her marble floor that caught my eye. They were deep and dark, like they’d been there for some time. I asked her some questions about the stains, but she was as clueless as a kitten in a yarn shop.

I got down on my hands and knees and took a closer look. The stains didn’t look like any kind of spill I’d seen before. They were too thick and too red. I had a hunch it wasn’t just a case of spilled wine or ketchup.

I pulled out my trusty magnifying glass and started to investigate. I happen to have one of those blood detection vials that you see on many of the CSI shows. I swabbed the stain and placed it in the vial and waited for the results. The stains were definitely blood. 

I told her what I’d found, and she looked pale as a ghost. She admitted that her husband had been acting strangely lately, and she thought he might be having an affair. I had a feeling the case was going to get even stickier.

I told her I wasn’t that kind of detective, and I was only there to ID the stains and tell her what she needed to remove them. After all, I’m not a CSI (Crime Scene Investigator), but I am a CSI (Certified Stone Inspector–  I can see why she might be confused). I’m also not a marriage counselor.

I told her that the best way to remove the stains was with a hydrogen peroxide poultice. I said I needed to run to my car and get her some instructions. As I made my way to the door, I heard a noise behind me. I turned around to see her husband standing there, I knew then that this was one case that was going to require more than just a little more finesse.

I raised an eyebrow at the husband’s sudden appearance. He had the look of a man who had been caught red-handed, and it wasn’t just the stains on his shirt that gave him away. I could tell he was nervous, and he didn’t try to hide it.

“Who the heck are you?” he asked, his voice trembling.

I introduced myself as the Stone Detective and explained why I was there. The husband seemed relieved but still wary of my presence. He didn’t say much else, just stood there fidgeting with his tie.

I made my way to the car and retrieved the instructions for the hydrogen peroxide poultice. When I returned, the wife was still in the same spot, staring at her husband with a mix of anger and sadness.

As I handed her the instructions, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. She was caught in the middle of something, and it wasn’t just the stains on her husband’s shirt.

“I hope this helps,” I said, trying to get out of there as fast as I could.

She thanked me and I made a hasty retreat for the door.

This was the first time I feared for my life doing a simple inspection. I thought about calling the cops, but I just got in my Woody and headed out of town. 

As I drove away, my mind was racing with questions about what was going on in that household. What had caused the stains on the man’s shirt? Was it an accident or something more sinister? And why did the wife seem so upset? I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had stumbled upon something much bigger than a simple stain removal job. But as much as I wanted to know more, I knew it was better for my own safety to stay out of it. Days turned into weeks and I found myself still thinking about that strange encounter. I even considered going back to the house to see if everything was okay, but I didn’t want to risk getting involved in something dangerous. Eventually, I let it go and focused on my work. But every once in a while, I would catch myself wondering what had really happened in that house and if the wife was okay.


The Stone Detective is a fictional character created by Dr. Frederick M. Hueston, PhD, written to entertain and educate. Dr. Fred has written over 33 books on stone and tile installations, fabrication and restoration and also serves as an expert for many legal cases across the world.  Send your comments to fhueston@stoneforensics.com.