As the old saying goes, "Out of the mouths of babes..." Children often see the world in a different way than their parents do, let alone their grandparents. Here are my favorite examples of "grandchild wisdom."

-A grandmother was putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye.

-My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 62. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at one?"

-After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-yearold say with a trembling voice,"Who was THAT?"

-A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire, it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

-My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?"..."You're both old," he replied.

-A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."

-I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these, yourself!"

-When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy sighed and whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the `skeeters are coming after us with flashlights."

-When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure..." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "mine says I'm 4 to 6."

-A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." Her grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said. "How do you make babies?" "Well, it's simple, once you know" replied the girl. "You just change `y' to `i' and add `es'!"

-A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one child. "No," said another. "He's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close."My Grandpa told me they use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."

-Said 5-year old Lisa, "My Grandparents are funny, when they bend over you hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog. I think that's funny, `cause they have a cat.

-Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him! (This is an eternal and universal truth. Would that we were as wise, and could command as much respect - -A.T.)

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